Tuesday, July 28, 2009

My newest love..

The day I purchased the iPod, I realized that I probably made the second best investment of my life (the first being my laptop). It is absolutely fantastic!! Though I am the queen of over exaggeration, I swear there’s none of it here. To me, my iPod is a gorgeous piece of equipment that sucks me out instantly from the occasionally dull routine of everyday life and transports (or rather in the Harry Potter universe ‘disapparates’ me) to another world where music and lyrics lay out a fascinating conundrum of ideas, imaginative possibilities, meshed up with my memories and spruced up by a dash of inspiration.

It is like my wired chair from the colorless, drab Zion to the deceptively seductive Matrix of infinite, superficial pleasures –the passion, the madness that only love can summon, the high that only drugs can give, the abandon that comes with irresponsibility, the intolerable pain that heartbreak brings, the adrenaline rush of a bungee fall; sometimes all at one go…One minute I am this zombie, sleepwalking through life with the maddening city bustling around me and the next minute as the iPod plugs in, I become this high-octane, supercharged megatron zooming past people, places experiencing everything on a different level of rhythm- induced fauxmoreality that seems more pulsating as I see things happen over the background track playing in my ears.

For eg: Like if I am at the railway station trying to break through the ranks of people, in an attempt to catch the elusive fast train and say the track ‘Adiemus’ (from the incomparable ‘Lord of the Rings’) is playing on the iPod, I begin to imagine myself as a hapless warrior trying to break through the enemy ranks, vanquishing hostile beings with every swish of my sword, inspite of my numerous, failing wounds, all in a desperate attempt to somehow make it to my fatally-wounded beloved’s side before death claims him forever. And trust me; this helps to enjoy the otherwise tragically unpleasant and tiring task of having to run for the train, day after day. It is so filmy, I know….but it is better than real life.

Then at other times, when I watch a couple walk by on the road, chatting, talking, laughing; generally enjoying each other’s company, I associate it with the love song playing in my ears. Suddenly the lyrics come alive, the tune becomes more melodious, it is like I am watching a mini movie unfold before me. And I remain astounded at how close these artistes, these musicians come to capture the essence of emotions in their words, their tunes…and how close I am getting to experiencing it thanks to the iPod.

And it is not just the music…Since I have the classic iPod, I have trailers…Lovely trailers of movies that seem eminently watchable and will most certainly never be released in India…How I love my country!! But still, it’s a joy to watch them. And then there are podcasts; about films, scriptwriting et all - masterfully narrated or intellectually discussed in interviews that are just like icing on the cake to the already piled-up fantabulousness of the iPod…

The only glitch though is that I have to exercise a very high level of self-control and try not to break into an impromptu sing-and-dance routine when I am listening to my favorite dance numbers….and that happens almost every day atleast a hundred times, so it’s a real test for me…but otherwise I am doing great with my iPod. Thank you, Steve Jobs!! You are a genius.

Right now the theme song of my life: ‘Jump’ by Madonna.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

That's me!!

I am the kind of person who'd die, go to heaven, be welcomed by the angels, have a seat all decorated for me, be escorted by beautiful demi-gods who'd take me to it, have a symphony played as I walk down to it, then as I sit on it and the ceremony reaches a crescendo, I realize that it is the sacramental seat for those to be sent as an envoy to hell - forever!!! And for what??? To try and reform the evil there....

That's all there is to my life!! No real heaven...only detour trips through it to hell....

Raindrops keep falling on...

Hey check out this pics that i clicked the other day at home; nothing new about them but was fun...
No photoshopping here; they are cropped a little though for effects....

Monday, July 06, 2009

Like a century has passed me by...

It does feel like that these days...I mean from the time that I left college, then joined Wipro, then left Wipro, then joined Mindscreen, studied, learnt, experienced there, then passed out, did films as an assistant, each one unique, met different people; people of all levels - moral, social, intellectual, spiritual, professional....got more than a peek at the stars - their lives, their ways, their mannerisms, their dedication to the job, their success, their pain, the way people perceive them, the way they truly are....seems like an eternity since that last day at college...I was 21 then, in a matter of 5 years, I feel like I have lived through 5 decades of life...and yet there are lapses of time in between where I remember being all by myself, devoid of any human contact for days together. Still I have so many million moments of having discovered people, one little idiosyncrasy at a time. And so many of them. And I remember them as if I have had them yesterday.

Sometimes I feel like I lived my life well....but then again maybe not. I spent time poring over books when other girls were discovering nailpolishes, scrap books and romances. I was visiting encyclopedic websites when others went club hopping; I was locked up in my room doing self-assigned projects when people were opening up to idea of beach vacations and rain dances. I was struggling to find my vocation when most were climbing up the professional ladder with the gusto of a trained tiger out to make a kill. Most of my friends are married by now, some might even be expecting a kid while I am still to even begin a decent relationship(an almost impossible concept to me) . I don't know if I am a loser or just one of those people who take too long...but then again how much is too long?

I'd like to think I am a little different....maybe not always in a good way but almost never in a bad way. I have taken time with things but then I have learnt my lessons well. I have never had a romance but I can bet my a** I can write a great love story. And even if I spend very less time with others in general, my mind makes every moment count. And to top it all, I have learnt to live centuries within a span of years...So even if die tomorrow, it hasn't been a sad life. Well a little sad but definitely not uninteresting.

I always thought I would wake up one day when I am 35, completely unable to recognise my husband lying next to me, dripping with sweat after having had a terrifying nightmare, unable to recall most of my boring life except the one moment when I should have made a decision to switch to what I really wanted to do and didn't find the courage to go ahead with it...This was my greatest fear till the day I changed the course of my life. Today I am not who I want to be but atleast I am somewhere on that path....not on the top but definitely trying to figure the best way up there...I guess it ain't too bad...somehow...

I believe..

That emptiness is the beginning of a new Universe
A whiff is the strain of a new scent
A lonely thread spurns a yarn
And a drifting heartbeat eventually makes a song

And that the Universe with these million scents woven into a thousand yarns floating amidst the beseeching melodies is worth the chaos of the Big Bang!!